The Sober choice: Self-Pity or Self-Love

There is really no excuse my friend, for breaking my heart again. This is where our journey ends!

…but the heart wants what it wants!

It happened again only because you forgot the lessons you learnt, the first time you did that mistake.

And you ought to keep excusing all the people constantly for breaking you ’cause you aren’t left with a better pick. For the “overly sensitive” people, heart-breaks are as prevalent as the change of Chief Ministers in Tamil Nadu. Seriously!

We either become resistant to the heart breaks or we keep evolving to be a victim always. These are the only possibilities. Most prefer the latter to the former ’cause it’s the effortless and convenient choice.

Being a victim will always have its perks. You get to be sad anytime with a legit reason: victim. As you’re an intensive person, you tend to encounter contentment in your sorrow. Moreover, you get to self-sympathize and make people pity you, too. A lot of benefits.

It’s easier to say you’re depressed than happy; because it feels so expensive to share happiness in real life. Sharing happiness is a kid’s play only in Instagram and Snapchat stories; not in real life. That’s because we’re selfish people basically. However, sadness is an exclusive piece of absurdity. You can share it anytime, anywhere, with anyone, more like a  “Sadness-ATM” – Sadness Automated Teller Machine.

You keep convincing yourself every time someone finds a fault in your behavior by showing your victim tag, to your heart. See, it’s smooth; painless; uncomplicated.

Yet, what’s the point? Whom are you trying to fake to? To your own self? Lunacy! You would die of guilt; guilt for ruining your own life if you keep using this victim tag, constantly.

Victim-hood leads to the self-sympathy. Self-sympathy is a comfortable tool but it does more destruction than recovery. It’s imperative for a living and it’s a self-care mechanism; but don’t let it become your living. It becomes a toxic habit. It can be your comfort zone and you might never be able to zone out of it.

Cowardice isn’t the pathway to escape reality. Someone once quoted,

“If the need to escape your reality and enter another, in order to avoid obstacles, arises, then stay; if you run, they’re running with you too.”

Every other person in this world is depressed or that’s what they go around saying. Get your facts right. There is a fair difference between sadness and depression. If you’re sad, your face can never hide it; but, you can be depressed and still smile ’cause you wouldn’t want to say it aloud on the first place.

And trust me, every day heart breaks don’t depress you; you just become sad. It wouldn’t last any more than a day. Or, precisely that’s the amount of time you’re supposed to invest on it.

Stop thinking about depression; you’re not. You’re just sad. And I swear, you can make your livelihood much better.

I read this somewhere : “If it’s not gonna matter in 5 yrs, don’t invest any more than 5 mins upset about it.” It’s legit and that’s how you ought to treat these.

Famous people quoted the following,

“Once you’ve accepted your flaws, no one can use them against you.”

“If people can use ‘lol’ without even laughing, then surely they can say ‘love you’ without loving you.”

“Some people aren’t loyal to you; they are loyal to the need of you. Once their need changes, so does their loyalty.”

“Stay away from people who make you feel like you’re hard to be loved.”

“Don’t convince yourself; believe in yourself. There’s a difference.”

Yeah, everyone knows it’s a hard day’s night to get out of the victim-hood.

Still, trust me, it’s worth it.

“Disappear into solitude and dedicate as many sunsets as you need to fall back in love with yourself.”

– Meggan Roxxane

– because self-love is the neutralizer of self-pity.

Ultimately, be the person you had aspired to turn into as a kid. That one realization, on the person you’ve grown up right now to the person you wished to become, can make a lot of difference on your perspective towards life.

Victim or Victor?

Self-pity or Self-love?

And the choice is yours. For once, choose wisely!

-Harini ♥